Cursory: Looking Over

Temporary relief,
Once again
In the form of
A delicious repast,

It goes by so fast,
Replaced by
Some new unpleasant task
Or disagreeable happening;

That’s how it goes,
Until equanimity is reached,
The walls of misery breached,
And the final letting go;

There are these moments of peace
But no everlasting release,
It’s only back to the kitchen
To prepare another feast,

It always comes back to food,
At least in my present mood;
It’s the simplest of pleasures
That seems to satisfy the most,

It’s all about
Basic needs:
Peace and quiet
And a full stomach.

And then?
That’s the question,
What’s next?
Suffering prevention?

I’ve tried to find that certainly,
But seems to be in short supply lately.
I’ll just have to keep going
And looking straight ahead
At what’s here until I’m finished.

Currents: Indigestible

Fuzzy mind,
Unable to settle,
Unable to concentrate;
It’s a migraine fog,

Difficult to penetrate,
Head like oatmeal:
Soggy and runny,
Milky and flaky,

My eyes swollen up too,
My stomach full of
Knots of nausea;
It’s most uncomfortable,

My back is hurting
From top to bottom,
My neck is tight
And my head aches too.

Oh, how I detest
This feeling,
And yet there’s a pleasantness
If I don’t fight it,

But if I give in
What will I achieve?
And there’s always
Buckets to do.

It’s suffering stew,
Luckily I enjoy cooking
That’s something at least,
And better than complaining;

Alas, my poor readers
Cannot partake in the feast,
But have to make do
With word soup instead.

Curly: Around and Around

Simply sitting,
Attempting to recapture
The state I experience
When listening to audio plays:

Effortlessly being,
Not thinking,
Just awareness,
Without disturbing emotions or discomforts;

But I seem unable to discover
How to sustain this effect
Without the aid of
Elaborate auditory input.

How peculiar,
What to make of it?
Is it merely some sort of habit?
And if so, how else to perpetuate it?

What’s needed
To bring it about
When I’m sitting?
And how get it to stay?

Meanwhile,
Aching aback the shoulders
Persists while settling in,
Waiting and observing:

Thoughts, feelings, sensations
Fizzing up and swirling
For the duration of
The sitting;

So many happenings
Buzzing through the mind,
Until I forget about them,
And then, unexpectedly, from within calm
I hear the bell chime.