Ensconced: Heart Notes

Picking up from where I left off yesterday, I also like Ajahn Chah’s comment, “Nowhere in the world is any real peace to be found. That’s the nature of the world. Look within yourself and find it instead” (A Tree in a Forest, 17).

The first two parts are certainly consistent with my experience and the third with my conclusion that if I want kindness, there’s no use waiting around for it to fall on me from somewhere ‘out there.’ Oh no! If I want any, I am going to have to make my own because it’s definitely an inside job.

Nevertheless, after the bliss and even the stability described in my previous post, as usual, the rage came, along with a desire for revenge.

But then, turning towards the heart and breathing through the heart, there was that stability again.

Continuing to look, I saw that the rage and desire were happening on the surface, i.e., were superficial, although moments before they had seemed so strong.

Oddly too, this part of the body in the area of the heart is a place where I often have a lot of pain from the Fibromyalgia, and it felt so strange, this combination of pain and stability.

No wonder I’ve had so much trouble finding it, as I’m often reluctant to bring my attention to that place because it hurts, but the stability too is very intense.

Then fear did indeed set in and it was back to breathing globally, i.e., with expanded attention, encompassing the entire body.

And so, I continue to see that there does indeed seem to be an instruction manual pre-installed. For every time I bring attention to the heart, I learn something new.

May the discoveries keep on coming and extend outwards to you, and you and you!
May all beings be well
May all beings be truly happy.
May all beings be free!

May it be so.

Enrolled: Taking Instruction From the Heart

One night, as I was sitting in a state of misery, it occurred to me (although I can’t remember why) to look up, A Tree in a Forest (Dhamma Garden, Chungli, Taiwan, R.O.C.: Yuan Kuang Publishing House, 1994).

The first thing that struck me was how, when asked to recommend a book on Buddhism, Ajahn Chah replied, “only one,” and pointed to his heart (vii).

And so, I decided to try reading that ‘book’ instead.

Almost at once, I began to fantasize in a way that made me feel very good, but then I remembered how whenever I get blissed out this is often followed by bouts of rage.

And then, my heart ‘said,’ “well then, don’t do that!”

“So, what do I do then?” I asked.

“Is there a middle way?”

After considering for a moment, I let go of the ‘bliss making,’ brought my attention to my breath and watched violet coloured clouds of bliss drifting off through the mind’s sky, and what was left was calm, steadiness of mind and clarity.

Uh huh! So now I see that contrary to popular opinion, we really do come with instruction manuals!

It’s like, when you buy a computer and you take it out of the box and you can’t find the instruction manual. And then somebody suggests you check the hard drive, and so you plug it in, turn it on and check the documents folder, and there it is.

So, perhaps what Ajahn Chah was saying, was that all we have to do is read the manual (which, of course, is unique to each make and model ;) ), and then we’ll know what to do.

Enriched: Deepening

Isn’t it funny
How everything
Is going ordinary again?
From infinity to beef stew!

And then back again,
And then,
‘What is this?’
‘What is this?’

I find sometimes
That all I want to do
Is sit
And ask this question,

Over and over
I inquire
And then
Await the results

And then
I forget
All about it
And move on to something else

But always
I come back again,
To asking
This question,

I’ve heard it said that
The asking
Is the point,
Whatever that means.

I’ve also heard it said that
Asking such a question is
A complete waste of time
But in any case,
It happens quite often.