Collect: Joining Forces

The narrative continues,
As myriad minutes
Stagger through
And disappear,

Fear and confusion
Appear
And vanish
Into the void;

Frustration seethes upward,
Anger flames;
Solar flares erupt
And black holes consume.

Blinding flashes of vitriol
And dark thoughts;
Stopping up the gaps
With hurt feelings tied up in knots.

But what’s in the space?
Peace and ease;
How strange,
To find such composure!

Serenity never abandoned me,
Even though
I feel engulfed in
A conflagration cycle;

When I look
From the outside
I am surprised to find that
All is as well as ever!

Buffeted by fierce solar winds
And gravitational shear,
Yet held in tranquility.
Stillness coexisting
With stellar intensity.

Collared: Mired in Misgivings

Bout of doubt,
Day two,
Feelings:
Angry and Blue.

But in Tara
I still believe:
She’s the light
That helps relieve

These dark feelings,
Of distrust
And grief,
Of neediness and craving,

She keeps the faith
While I wobble,
Stumble and fumble
Around Samsara,

Because her realm
Is Nirvana,
The place where
Certainty and hesitation meet.

Patiently she sits
Awaiting my return
To my senses,
And my path—if there is one.

It’s been said,
“We are here to learn.”
What shall I discover
If I continue looking?

I’m afraid to find out;
So, I turn away
When I should turn towards.
Where does acceptance go
When it goes?

Collapse: Doubters’ Prison?

Oh, botheration!
I’ve hit a snag:
I’m sick of meditation
This Dharma is a drag!

How long this time,
Will this last?
Is it the end?
I wonder,

Or, to be ignored
As just another
Dharma blunder?
Who is stealing my thunder?

Is it me,
Or the weather,
Should I give up,
Or try harder?

Apply more effort,
Is that what it takes?
In this snakes and ladders
It feels all snakes.

Why serpents?
This is no Eden,
I’m merely fighting
For my freedom.

Is that what I’m doing?
Striving for liberation
When did that happen?
I thought I was dreaming.

I wanted to get through the day
Without screaming,
What is this, new scheming?
I’ve lost my way again;
I hope I can recover.